Autism, Bad days, Parenting, Uncategorized

Terrible Tantrums

The good days are absolutely amazing.  The bad days make you want to bury your head in the sand.  Today I was really wishing I was an ostrich.

Today was hard.  It started at 2:30ish this morning when Seamus came into our bedroom ready to party.  Crap.  It’s not time for this yet.  We should still be safe for another three hours… Okay, lets go down and sit on the couch.  I turned on some cartoons and pushed the coffee table against the couch so Seamus wouldn’t accidentally fall off if he fell back to sleep and rolled. I covered my head and hoped to doze back to sleep.  AT about 5:00am I woke up panicked.  He wasn’t laying on my feet like he had been two hours earlier.  Crap.  Where did he go?!?!  If you know me well you know I’m pretty much night blind (thanks, mom) so, I stumble back up the stairs and make it into my bedroom just to find Seamus back in my bed and snuggled in with Jeremy.  That little jerk left me on the couch after a waking me up at 2:30am.  At least he was accounted for.  I stumbled back down the stairs and got to sleep until almost 6:00am before I left for my early morning walking date.

I got home a little after 7:30am and Seamus had an Appointment down at the hospital at 8:00am for Sensory Integration.  He fights getting his shoes and socks on.  Fights coming out of the house.  Fights getting into the car, and again when we got to the hospital at 7:57 and he wanted to play cars in the back seat.  His session went pretty well and his therapist seemed pretty pleased with how he did today.  Time to go, and guess who doesn’t want to hold hand, be carried, or just walk on the sidewalk?  Oh, that would be Seamus.  He wanted to chase a bus down the road.  I catch him and scoop him up in a weird hold I use when he fights.  one arm between his legs and the other by his shoulder.  My hands connect at his belly, his face pointed to the ground and he can’t kick or headbutt me from here.

We got home and did I managed to get a little housework done.  He followed me from room to room dumping out toys and laundry just to make sure it would look like I hadn’t actually done anything today.  We had a quick lunch, just leftovers.  Then I had a few errands to run this afternoon and the first stop was scheduled for 2:30.  I knew it was going to be a struggle so I started ushering Seamus towards the back door at 2:10.  Unfortunately when he’s focused on what he is doing he acts like he can’t hear you.  He wont acknowledge his name or look up.  I set him on the coffee table and strapped on his light-up Velcro sneakers.  He starts screeching.  His feet are often tricky.  He isn’t always welcoming to his shoes and socks.  Crap.  Okay, you can go in just your socks.  Let’s go.  We made our two stops and I thought maybe he could use a trip to the park and get some playground time.  We pulled in at our favorite playground.  I tell him he has to wear his shoes if he wants to go play.  I slide on his fancy footwear and the screeching begins.  Again.  We were drawing attention to ourselves.  People start giving you the look.  The why can’t you control your kid look.  I quickly pull him on and set him on the ground.  I make sure he can see the playground and he immediately stops.  The pleasure of the playground outweighs the irritation of having to wear shoes.  He burned off a lot of energy at the park today.  It was busy and there were kids ranging from about a year into their teens.  Things were going beautifully until they weren’t.  He convinced himself that he needed to get his hands on a big red ball a group of teenage girls were playing with.  Here we go again.  I scooped him up so he couldn’t fight me and we headed back for the car.  He played for a little over an hour and thankfully it was enough so that when we got home he was content to settle in on the couch and relax with a snack.  The magic hour was upon us.  Lets go sit outside and wait for dad to come home.  For some reason when the days are the worst something happens when Jeremy walks in the door after work.  Maybe it’s because he’s not frustrated from the nine hour battle.  The evening has gone smoothly and all I can hope for is that tomorrow will be better.

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